I am me.

I am not perfect.
I try to do the best that I can, set goals that I can reach, and do anything to achieve them.

But I've gotten a little lost along the way, and now here I am, struggling with Anorexia, Depression, and Self Harm.

My blog isn't supposed to be a happy place. Or an advice giving place. It's just a place that I can write out all my thoughts, everything I feel, without being judged!
Maybe you'll find solace in my struggles, someone to understand. Maybe you'll find interest in watching my journey through my life, or maybe you'll even take one look at this, and turn away. Every reaction is a lesson, and I am here to learn.

This blog is access into my most private thoughts.
With that being said, enjoy!

Friday, April 3, 2015

Hiya

Well Hi.
I'm sorry for just disappearing, for not updating. If anyone still reads this. I don't want to become another "ghost" blog.

So an update?
I almost finished my first class for school, and registered for my 2nd class. Found out both have to be completed by May 5. So now I am super anxious about that.
I have been working pretty much every day. And along with that, I have been avoiding pretty much everyone. I haven't hung out with my best friend in like 2 wewks because she is naturally tiny and it's so trigering to me.
I'm stuck in a pity party.
I wish I was dead. I'm taking laxies tonight even though I work tomorrow morning because I am desperate. I need to lose weight.

I got drunk with my bf the other day. It was wonderful. Not doing much else but trying to survive. I really wanna dye my hair again.

Honestly, I am more active on Instagram right now.... ao if you want you can follow me at last_day_to_live (:

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2 comments:

  1. LeeTiger28April 5, 2015 at 5:42 PM

    Hey, I definitely still read.
    For some reason, nearly every time you text me, I am not able to send replies. It always says "message not sent" no matter how many times I try. So forgive me for never texting back, after like, our third message. I'm trying to get it fixed.
    I'm sorry about you having to isolate yourself from your best friend, but you and your boyfriend sound like you're doing well.
    Take care of yourself.
    <3 Lee

    ReplyDelete
  2. BellaApril 7, 2015 at 4:18 PM

    We're still here! I don't know about everyone else, but I have to pretty actively dislike someone to go through all the effort of unfollowing their blog :P
    I hope all works out well with school. I know it's gotta be a lot on top of working and maintaining a relationship and everything else, but I'm cheering you on the whole way.

    <3
    xxxx

    ReplyDelete

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