I had a bagel for breakfast, along with some ramen around 1am this morning. So that totals up to 560 calories.
I had intended to go to the gym before I went to work today, however I realized just how little time I actually had and therefore can't do that. But as I will be walking the 3 miles from my house to work, that should burn around 100 cals (maybe) and then the 6 hours I spend standing at work should help out as well. So I would estimate burning about 150 -200 cals doing that.
So my total intake for the day would be 360 cals. When I get home, if I am not too tired I know I will find some other form of exercise that I can do.
Still don't know my weight. I know that I should weigh myself, but I just can't make myself face the music. If today goes well though, I'll weigh in tomorrow. If it doesn't, then I guess it's just to try again tomorrow and weigh the next day.
I am so not looking forward to work, considering how the last day I worked went. I hate my coworkers. They are lazy fucking people and I hate them. But it's just to smile and pretend that they're fucking geniuses I guess. Until I can find another job.
Once my boyfriend pays off his warrant, he is going to get another job. Which I don't know how I feel about because I understand why he wants to get another job but at the same time I don't know who I would be working there if he wasn't there as well. If that makes any sense.
Just too many thoughts that I don't know what to do with and sometimes I feel like it's so hard to talk to my boyfriend because I don't want him to leave me because I'm that "insecure clingy girlfriend". I'm just gonna put in my headphones today and blast my music so I don't have to listen to my thoughts... at least until I go to work.
I am me.
I am not perfect.
I try to do the best that I can, set goals that I can reach, and do anything to achieve them.
But I've gotten a little lost along the way, and now here I am, struggling with Anorexia, Depression, and Self Harm.
My blog isn't supposed to be a happy place. Or an advice giving place. It's just a place that I can write out all my thoughts, everything I feel, without being judged!
Maybe you'll find solace in my struggles, someone to understand. Maybe you'll find interest in watching my journey through my life, or maybe you'll even take one look at this, and turn away. Every reaction is a lesson, and I am here to learn.
This blog is access into my most private thoughts.
With that being said, enjoy!
With that being said, enjoy!
thinking of you hunni <3
ReplyDeleteThanks. Xx
DeleteI love you sweetie, and I'm always here to listen to you =)
ReplyDeleteXOXO