There's certain things people will do for you because they love or care about you. Then there's the things that make those you love or care about go out of their way for you. I'm always in the latter category.
Whenever I need something from someone, it's always an inconvenience, even if they don't say that. But I know they're thinking it.
They think that their life would be easier without me in it, but it's not like they can say that either. But they think it.
I'm sorry. That's all I can ever say, but they're just words. They don't change anything, don't make it better. I wish I didn't have to ask for things. I wish I could hide myself from everyone and do everything to make their life easier, not harder. But it never works that way.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I mean it, and I feel immense guilt when I inconvenience others. But eventually those words lose their meaning, and eventually nobody will hear me anymore.
This is why I don't stick around people long enough. I've seen how my relationships with people change from good to terrible. Seen how they hate me a little bit more when I need them, because I'm always an inconvenience. So if I leave before that happens, surely it's for the best, right?
It's written in everything that I am. I'm an inconvenience and a burden to everyone. And since I don't know how to change it, I guess I'll just have to keep moving on.. Never sticking in one place for long. The same goes for friendships and relationships. I guess I can't have lasting ones.
*sigh* I'm sorry.
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