Looking Forward

I am being productive today. Or trying.
I'm going to throw myself into school, do my chores, enjoy my last day of the weekend, and try my hardest to not eat.
My body is used to living on 1 meal a day, so therefore, to lose weight, I have to eat less than that.

Not easy.
Life with Ana is never easy.
But it's worth it.

My dad finally booked tickets and a condo for Hawaii in January. I am excited to go.
But I'm terrified. It will all be shorts and tank tops and bikini's. I don't want to be fat. I hate the way my thighs jiggle when I walk. That's the worst. So if I can lose a little bit of weight, then I can feel that much better.

I have until January 22nd. That's when we leave. I have to work my hardest.
I can do this.
Ana can help me.

I'm going to try to stay goal oriented and not give into the negative thoughts. The ones that tell me I will always be fat. That I will always be that girl. I won't.

I've got a long to do list today, and hopefully I can do it. Finals are in 2 weeks. I'm terrified. Most of them are easy, the only hard ones will be World History, Spanish, and Chem. I am so bad at Chem. I just don't understand it. Maybe I can bullshit my way thorough it, to pass. (:

So far so good today. I'm feeling good. Hope I can keep it up.
Hope life for everyone out there reading this is well. If it isn't, well I'm always here to talk, if you want. Xx