Just stop. I need everything to stop.
I've been missing too much school. Doing a few too many things I shouldn't.
Food is out of control. I am out of control. School is out of control.
Just stop!
Tomorrow, I am going to eat nothing. Drink nothing. I am going to prove to myself once and for all that I am not a waste of space.
I am going to fight for what I want, day by day. I am going to get it.
It is not too late to turn September around. It is not too late to reach my UGW.
If I stop the uncontrollable eating, then everything else will go right. It's all up to me.
I am going to take 2 half hour walks a day. At least. One in the morning before school and one after school. I will not fail myself again.
Fuck my roommates. Fuck being cautious. I am going to do this.
This is the last chance I am giving myself. It's this or.. Nothing. But I will prove my self worth. By food. I can and I WILL do this.
My goal for now is 4 lbs by the end of the week. So... Saturday. 4 lbs in 4 days? I can do it. I think.
I am me.
I am not perfect.
I try to do the best that I can, set goals that I can reach, and do anything to achieve them.
But I've gotten a little lost along the way, and now here I am, struggling with Anorexia, Depression, and Self Harm.
My blog isn't supposed to be a happy place. Or an advice giving place. It's just a place that I can write out all my thoughts, everything I feel, without being judged!
Maybe you'll find solace in my struggles, someone to understand. Maybe you'll find interest in watching my journey through my life, or maybe you'll even take one look at this, and turn away. Every reaction is a lesson, and I am here to learn.
This blog is access into my most private thoughts.
With that being said, enjoy!
With that being said, enjoy!
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