I haven't had access to the internet for a few days, but I did try to post off of my phone. I learned that didn't work. So for right now, I'm gonna have to post what I would have posted on Wednesday, if I'd had the chance.
Today was probably the best I've felt in a while. I went to the mall with A, and we tried on a bunch of dresses, as well as random hats. We took a ride on a train, played glow in the dark mini golf, rode a rollercoaster simulator (Which was tons of fun!!), and just had a fun day. I actually felt beautiful in the dresses that I tried on!
For the first time in over a year, I ate lunch without knowing how many calories were in it, and I didn't feel bad about myself afterwards! After we got tired of being at the mall, we went back to her house and had a relaxing and funny movie night. We watched Vampires Suck, Young Adult, and The Sitter. I loved all of them!
I'm super excited for tomorrow, because I get to hang out with my boyfriend, though he leaves next Saturday. :( I am gonna take a lot of photos of him, so that he can be with me even when he isn't here... Kinda cheesy? I don't care! At least this way I can remember the fun times we had, and make a bunch of memories that I can always keep. Plus, I needed photos for my scrapbook. So I'm super pumped for that, though I don't know what I'm gonna do tomorrow night, since I have to go home to my dad's, even though he doesn't want me there. I tried to talk to him and ask him if we could try to work this out mutually, He said that he had his set rules and that neither them nor he were going to change.
But even that can't bring me down right now! I'm so excited for tomorrow, and if he's alright with it, I'll post some photos! I know that I will get through this thing with my dad, and that I will find a way to be stronger. It will be hard, and it will take a while, but I know that I can do it!
I never got a chance to post the photos, but i'll definatly put them up soon!!
I am me.
I am not perfect.
I try to do the best that I can, set goals that I can reach, and do anything to achieve them.
But I've gotten a little lost along the way, and now here I am, struggling with Anorexia, Depression, and Self Harm.
My blog isn't supposed to be a happy place. Or an advice giving place. It's just a place that I can write out all my thoughts, everything I feel, without being judged!
Maybe you'll find solace in my struggles, someone to understand. Maybe you'll find interest in watching my journey through my life, or maybe you'll even take one look at this, and turn away. Every reaction is a lesson, and I am here to learn.
This blog is access into my most private thoughts.
With that being said, enjoy!
With that being said, enjoy!
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