Well tonight was my last night with Cimiron.... and now that he's leaving to go back to NY, it hurts worse than I thought it would. I love him so much, he is the best thing that has ever happened to me, and though I know he will be back, that doesn't stop my tears, or how much I'm gonna miss him......
I just want him to be here, I don't want him to be anywhere else, ever. I know that sounds kinda childish, but I love him with all of my heart... I am in love with him. He is the best thing that has happened to me, and a year seems so god damn far away.....
This summer was amazing, and the best summer I've ever had, but I don't want it to end.... I don't want to let him go, if for even a little while................ ='(
I am me.
I am not perfect.
I try to do the best that I can, set goals that I can reach, and do anything to achieve them.
But I've gotten a little lost along the way, and now here I am, struggling with Anorexia, Depression, and Self Harm.
My blog isn't supposed to be a happy place. Or an advice giving place. It's just a place that I can write out all my thoughts, everything I feel, without being judged!
Maybe you'll find solace in my struggles, someone to understand. Maybe you'll find interest in watching my journey through my life, or maybe you'll even take one look at this, and turn away. Every reaction is a lesson, and I am here to learn.
This blog is access into my most private thoughts.
With that being said, enjoy!
With that being said, enjoy!
Just focus on how amazing your summer was and you get to have another one in just a short year :) It may seem like it now but it's not that far away! :) Heck, it could even be possible for you to get a job, save a little money and go see him yourself in six months! It could be good trip if it was possible! :)
ReplyDeleteThere is so much that can happen in a year... even if that is breaking up. I don't think we will, because our relationship is strong, but it is a possibility.
DeleteHowever, I don't know. I was gonna try to move up there, because I have always wanted to live there, and now that I can't be here, I might as well, y'know? But I need to figure out how to get up there.
Well don't let that thought cross your mind! There's no point in wasting time thinking about the possibilities and 'what ifs' when nothing good will come of it :)
DeleteOh, that's an even better idea! I'm sure you'll figure out a way or something will appear to you :) If it's meant to be then it'll happen :)
That it will. Besides, Manhattan has always been amazing to me, and if I got to go live there and be happy at the same time, why wouldn't I take it?
DeleteIt's beautiful there.. the city is amazing!!! :D