I am me.

I am not perfect.
I try to do the best that I can, set goals that I can reach, and do anything to achieve them.

But I've gotten a little lost along the way, and now here I am, struggling with Anorexia, Depression, and Self Harm.

My blog isn't supposed to be a happy place. Or an advice giving place. It's just a place that I can write out all my thoughts, everything I feel, without being judged!
Maybe you'll find solace in my struggles, someone to understand. Maybe you'll find interest in watching my journey through my life, or maybe you'll even take one look at this, and turn away. Every reaction is a lesson, and I am here to learn.

This blog is access into my most private thoughts.
With that being said, enjoy!

Saturday, November 2, 2013

Oh yeah!

I honestly can't remember what I did yesterday. Well, most of it. I don't remember what I ate, though I know it wasn't much.

I haven't weighed myself either. I feel like maybe yesterday and today haven't been good days, though it's only 10am here.

I had breakfast, and a big one at that. I'm scared to check the total cals I had, though I know what it is. I guess I will be walking it off, or something. I have to burn at least 400  cals. I'm not eating for the rest of the day anyways.

I'm not weighing myself either, because I'm a bit afraid to. I need to get back into the swing of things. Which I will start by doing 1 hour of interval walking, which I've figured out burns 253 cals. So basically, if I do that twice today, I should be good. But I don't feel good. I feel disgusting. I'm not empty.

I don't even know if this makes any sense, but whatever.
In other news.... I GOT MY TATTOO!!!!

I was so stoked. It didn't even hurt, except when he got close to my spine, because I don't have a lot of meat there. But even then, it wasn't that bad. So now I just have to treat it for about 2 weeks, and then I can just chill. I can't show anyone, not really. Because my family doesn't know that I got it.


I understand now why people say they're addictive.... Because they are! I'm already planning on ways to get my next one, but that requires getting a job first, and I'm not in any rush to get it either.

Now my family wants to go up to the mountains, and I'm not sure if I want to or can go with them. I have to start studying, and I have some stuff that I have to work on. Yay for school. It can be so tiring at times though. Anyways, that's all for now. I'll post intakes later, once I can remember what it is that I ate yesterday... So weird.

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